Hammy’s Pizza

Give me a few drinks and I find myself ranting for an uncomfortable amount of time about Portland’s appalling lack of late night pizza joints (first I will ramble about the threats of artificial intelligence and nanobots, of course). Like most tipsy ramblers, it turns out that that my facts are not entirely accurate (this is not so when it comes to nanobots). Portland’s fabulous Hammy’s Pizza is not only open for take-out until 2:30am—and open for delivery until 4:00am— but it’s incredible pizza will cause even the mightiest pizza snobs to fall to their knees in joy. If you see someone eating Hammy’s Pizza and they are not falling to their knees in joy, then they are likely a rogue AI machine or under control of the nanobots. Confront them and seize their pizza!

Hammy’s Pizza is located on Clinton St. in the Hosford-Abernethy neighborhood and is an easy bike ride from almost anywhere in SE Portland. Its menu includes 17” pies for about 20 bucks, personal pizzas for about 8 bucks, and calzones for 9 or 10 bucks. No pizza by the slice, unfortunately. The topping selection includes pizzeria rarities like pine nuts, fresh scallions, and homemade vegan parmesan, or you can get a specialty pie like the aristocratic King Earl’s Deliverance pizza, with pancetta, bacon, sausage, and extra cheese.

They also will sell and deliver DVDs with their pizzas. Have you ever watched Rambo: First Blood while smothering your throat with pizza of legendary tastiness? You are not living! Most of the DVDs are reasonably priced, although I find the $10 asking price for Tomb Raider 2 to be quite offensive.

By Grant Wilson

Pros

• Late night pizza – carry out and delivery
• Vegan friendly
• Deliver dvds
• Rad neighborhood

Cons

• No pizza by the slice
• Price can be questionable
• Nanobots!