October 1999
Animal Law Cited by
New York Times
PILP's "No Talent Show" Raises Money and Spirits
By Emily Davis, Tom Miller, and
Shanley Richardson
Dramatically squelching innumerable stereotypes about law students and law school, the Public Interest Law Project (PILP)'s first annual "No Talent Show" was a truly unusual spectacle. Most members of the law school community attended this unforgettable event, and PILP raised over $300 for local legal nonprofits.
Pre-show entertainment was provided by seven of NWSL's beloved professors, who, some fully clothed and others in full-body lycra, gamely volunteered to be unceremoniously dunked, to the resounding delight of an amphitheater full of students. Pitching for the students were several excellent shots, much to the chagrin of the shivering victims. With passion and indignance the envy of any Titanic cast member, Professor Mandiberg was heard to declare indignantly, "Hey! This is cold!" Nonetheless, their good-natured plunges reminded us all, if somewhat literally, that we are all in the tank together.
The irreverent festivities continued, as from the flock stepped a few brave souls and the talentless acts began. Second-years Adam Cornell and Sean Riddell, in a display surely recorded by lurking authorities in Sean's permanent records, donned crazy wigs and truly embarrassing attire and crooned "I got you, babe." (Don't ask, don't tell.) First-years Chanpone Sinlapasai, Klarissa Garza, Nana Pao, and Elizabeth Kelly brought down the house, showcasing eighties dance moves to the Vanilla Ice classic "Ice Ice Baby," and Andy Hanson (sage 2L) waxed folksy with ponderous ballads about his first year of law school.
Third-years Ann Coch and Thomas McElroy, with Josh The Real Life Musician, treated eclectic music lovers to impressive renditions of Madonna's "Like a Virgin" and Black Sabbath's "Paranoia," while second-years Ivan Velasco and Eric Helmy, not to be out-bizarred, performed a Monty Python skit upside down, from a handstand. Even Professor Bailey got into the act, sharing bedtime nursery rhymes in a startlingly uncanny Bullwinkle voice, reading from a book of nursery rhymes he apparently bought at an elementary school's "banned books" sale.
The No Talent Show's defining moment arrived when the beatnik troupe of second-years Mara Fields, Michelle McIsaac, Heather Self, and Ivan Velasco took the stage. With his companions' flute, bongos, and chimes to inspire him, and with the brooding angst of a true artist, Ivan undertook to convey the true meaning of the Bill of Rights in a quite unforgettable "interpretive dahnce." At once terrifying and hilarious, the spandex-clad vision gyrated, yogaed, and sprang with energy and panache across the makeshift stage. And with sides splitting, students voiced their opinion, at a quarter a vote, that the Velasco dahnce was truly the epitome of talentless absurdity. The troupe were the deserving winners of the grand prize, a cheesy poster of the Hale-Bopp comet that hasn't sold at the annual PILP auction after two years on the block. In a tribute to PILP's philosophy of equality, the four winners promptly split the poster in fours.
After all was said, done, and dahnced, PILP had raised $352.50 to be contributed to three local, legal, non-profit organizations. Specifically, the Native American Project of Oregon Legal Services (NAPOLS), St. Andrew's Legal Clinic, and a third yet-to-be-announced organization will share the proceeds. The No Talent Show was the first of PILP's monthly fund-raisers.
PILP members express their gratitude to everyone who helped make this event such a stunning success, especially the professors who contributed their time and a small fraction of their dignity to the dunk tank.