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International Students and Scholars

Parents' Advice

The following "off-to-college" advice was taken from an edition of The Oregonian newspaper. It offers advice for both parents and students.

For Parents

Don't call every day, or even every other day.

Keep the details of your empty-nest syndrome to yourself. It's not fair to lay it on your grown child.

Don't blackmail with money. One student said, "It's pathetic, and it won't work."

Resist trying to control your kids' behavior as you did at home. Instead, offer praise and support, particularly in terms of budgeting and goal-setting.

Don't try to solve your kids' problems. If they talk, listen and let them vent. If their problems are serious, however, urge them to talk to the college staff or a counselor

For Students

Don't ask your parents for money constantly.

Solve your own problems instead of relying on your parents to rescue you.

Call or write your family regularly. It's OK to set boundaries, but family support is still important.

Make studying a bigger priority than socializing. Try setting specific times to study just as you schedule class time.

Talk about your feelings. If you find yourself in trouble either academically or emotionally, find someone who can teach you to work through the problem. If that's your family, give them a call.